Flexibility And Pet Peeves

One of the greatest challenges we as people may experience in our lives is that of being flexible -- of managing conflicts or frustrations in a reasonable and mature manner.  When a person at the grocery store line jumps in front of you or accidentally spills juice all over your shoes.  Or when the person waiting on your table at a restaurant forgets to put in your order.  Or maybe even the neighbor's dog barking in the middle of the night and keeping you up.  These are all moments when a bit of patience and flexibility can go a long way!

The Aspie Insiders met up last week to discuss this concept and what it means to us.  Here are some of the thoughts they had on the subject:

• One Insider mentioned the need to be flexible while he worked at Harris-Teeter.  He explained that in moments when he lost his cool, he was quick to apologize.
• Another member talked about how some people can "cross boundaries" in a given situation and make being flexible an extremely hard thing to do.
• It's important to keep in mind that there's a proper balance between being assertive and being flexible.  Being flexible doesn't mean that you're willing to be taken advantage of; rather, it means that a person can get along with others in times of stress.
• If you're stressed out or feel you can't be flexible, it's important to take steps to fix a situation before it starts.

As we talked about the importance of being flexible, one of our members mentioned the way the general population views Asperger's Syndrome.  It was mentioned that most people tend to treat those with Asperger's just as normal people.  This works most of the time, but in moments of stress (especially in either an educational or occupational setting) the Insiders wished other people would be more flexible with them.

The last thing we added to the discussion was a quick step-by-step list for asking for help.  It looked something like this:

1. Identify what you need
2. Identify who you should talk to to get what you need
3. Think about what you need to say to this person
4. Address the issue or challenge
5. Work together to produce solutions
6. Repeat if necessary

In today’s hectic, crowded world, following these steps and asking for help can significantly improve a person's life.  Help exists, but being able to know when and how to ask for it is a skill in itself.

IN THE COMMENTS SECTION, SHARE YOUR OWN STORY ABOUT HOW ASKING FOR HELP MADE YOUR LIFE A LOT EASIER.  WHAT TIPS DO YOU HAVE FOR THOSE WHO STRUGGLE WITH ASKING FOR HELP?